The Effects of Extreme Parenting

Parents are some of the most important and valuable people in the lives of children. From birth, children learn and are reliant on their parents, as well as other guardians, “to protect and care for them”(Breiner, H. et al, 2016) in order to promote their overall well being. Whether a parent is implementing love, judgment, or just rulemaking, the foundation and establishment of a healthy child to parent relationship can make a huge impact on their teenage lives(Breiner, 2016). In a study done by the University of Michigan evaluating parents emotional availability and the effect it has on the children, it was suggested that “emotional involvement of parents does matter and affect the outcome of their child's emotional competence and regulation” (Herrera, C. et al, 2002). Parents and/or guardians are a necessity for the proper growth and development of a child, “when parents and other caregivers are able to support young children, children’s lives are enriched, and society is advantaged by their contributions”(Board on Children, Youth, and Families, et al., 2016). When regarding and analyzing parenting strategies of immigrants in western society, it becomes apparent that over-involvement and under involvement can have adverse effects. Some of those impacts are “anxiety, lack of problem-solving skills, difficulty in decision making, and poor self-advocacy skills”(Borgen, 2011). Another one of those impacts can also be “increased student achievement”(Shiffman, Dunn, 2013). In Zadie Smith's novel, White Teeth, the readers learn that parenting situations are often as varied as people vary, and there is no one size fits all approach.

Helicopter parenting is the management of children's lives that is more extreme than “normal involvement, support, and discipline”(Comstock, 2014). Helicopter parents become over-involved in their children's’ lives in ways such as school and friendships with other children. When these parents become intensely involved in their children lives, they tend to make all decisions for their children hindering them from making decisions for themselves. This, in turn, causes their children to “find it difficult to learn to solve their own problems”(Comstock, 2014). Children who do not cope well with so much protective parenting are most likely to grow up to be “naive and become an easy target for anyone taking advantage of them”(Bhatia, 2016). Some children, later in life, may develop “anxiety or resentment” as a result of being “smothered by their parent” and may also “develop an extreme rebellious streak”(Bhatia, 2016). In the novel, White Teeth, Zadie Smith shows the impact a parent has on a child and how their decisions can affect the ways in which their children go about their lives.

Since parents influence their children at a young age, they should allow their children to mature and have the ability to accept or reject some of their parent's characteristics.. This is not the case with mother and daughter Hortense and Clara Bowden in Zadie Smith's White Teeth. During the early chapters of the book, the readers are introduced to Hortense. Hortense is a devout Jehovah's Witness that is undaunted after living through two predicted Judgement Days. Hortense's character illustrates how once a parent imposes their beliefs onto their children not allowing them to explore who or what they want to be, their children might look elsewhere in search of salvation. Smith shows this through Clara’s change in character when she meets Ryan Topps who, at that moment, Clara thought would make her the person she wanted to be. Clara’s “mind, clothes, walk, and soul changed” (Smith, 32) all in an effort to leave behind or mask her life as a devout Jehovah's witness. Hortense’s overinvolvement in Clara’s life had an overall negative impact on Clara and Hortense’s relationship as well as with Clara’s character. Throughout the novel, the readers are introduced to different families and different methods of parenting. Hortense’s methods of raising Clara could be described as helicopter parenting.

In this generation, society deems overbearing and over-involved parents helicopter parents. The label in itself has created a negative connotation because of guilt by association, meaning that guilt is attributed to someone not because of evidence, but because of association with an ‘offender. In the novel, White Teeth, Smith illustrates the benefits of helicopter parenting by introducing the Chalfens. The Chalfens are an example of “proper British whiteness.” The term Chalfenism, used in the novel, is something that is “seen as an opportunity for the immigrant characters to embrace and assimilate into British life” (R, 2014). Joyce’s over-involvement in Millat’s life especially was in an effort to ‘fix’ him. Joyce Chalfen “needed to be needed”(Smith, 265). Once