A Mind

In my mind, I am my own executioner when it comes to the way that I perceive myself, however, it is only when I am deep in my own abyssal thoughts that I am in my heaven. In my mind, for one moment, is a place where I bring myself down into the depths of bitter judgment and isolation, and yet through my own isolation, I find that I am comforted.

Many people are intimidated and threatened by such a place, which will and ultimately haunt them long after they have left it. They self-consciously think, "How could such a horrible travesty happen to them in a place where serenity and tranquility should exist?" Such questions are left unanswered in their thoughts and in their dreams. Questions that haunt them relentlessly for as long as the mind can handle it, without snapping into the midst of insanity. What if this place is not one you can just easily walk away from, but a horrid and dreadful place where you have become trapped? A place that when reminiscing, will stir the horrible sights and sounds of your psyche? What if this place is one that you are forced to live with, without breaking the limits of sanity? What if this place is deep inside your inter-mind, a place where you are forced to go to for comfort in a bitter-sweet manner and yet every time you leave, you feel even more torn and broken than before? These places of haunting features are only inexistent because of the mysteries of the mind. Your mind and inter-mind are the most important places of ones being, but sometimes they too can lead you to do things that are deemed unforgivable in the eyes of others.

When I look in the mirror, I see someone that is not fit to walk among others. I see a person that does not deserve the friends that I have or the life I live. My mind is what is tearing me apart, because every time I think about my acceptance from others, I bring myself down to depths farther than I was before. I regret every time I think of myself, and I cannot help but to want to crawl back to this place for comfort. At the same time that I am being comforted, I also find that it is the only place where I am truly alone. I am being pushed farther