Communication Theory

COMM THEORY FINAL

Theory 1: Social Penetration Theory: Altman and Taylor

Altman and Taylor first described the process of self-disclosure as peeling back the layers of an onion, which possess both breadth and depth. “Breadth” refers to the various facets of a person’s life, such as work, family, community and hobbies. “Depth” pertains to the details concerning each of these areas. The outer layers of the onion represent superficial information about a person, such as physical appearance and speech. The deeper layers represent more intimate information, such as the person’s thoughts, feelings and relationships with others. As a person self-discloses to a friend or partner, she peels away the outer layers of her self toward exposing her core nature. Self-disclosure is defined as voluntary sharing of personal history, preferences, attitudes, feelings, values, secrets etc. in order to establish transparency with another person. There are four observations or tenets that bring closeness. The first is peripheral. Items are exchanged sooner and more frequently then private information. To go back to the onion metaphor, the outside is wider and more surface area then the inside. So, this would be exchanging things like where are you from, what is your major, talking about the weather, or menial conversation, also known as “small talk”.  A good example of this is when the two parents meet and exchange information to get to know each other. Also, when the Joanna’s dad and the Dr. meet, exchanging information. The second step is making sure self-disclosure is reciprocated. Especially in the early stages of relationship development there has to be a give and take. Openness of one person leads to openness of the other, law of reciprocity. When the moms are talking on the terrace, after Joanna’s mom gives her thoughts it is assumed that the Dr.’s mom will give hers. There is a consistent back and forth when two people are talking together Observation three, penetration is rapid at the start, but slows down quickly as the tightly wrapped inner layers are reached. There is normal internal resistance because social norms go against telling too much too fast. However, when this is achieved, relationships become more important to both parties, meaningful and enduring. One thing that can happen if you begin to close off areas that were previously open is de-penetration. This is a gradual process of layer-by-layer withdrawal. Slowly you begin to pull back and the relationship will begin to deteriorate. “Self-disclosure results in vulnerability, and becoming vulnerable to another person can carry significant costs. Therefore, the extent to which a person chooses to self disclose depends upon the outcome of the reward-cost assessment. Sharing personal information can strengthen relationships; increase physical and emotional intimacy and open new lines of communication with a partner. However, if a partner were to react badly to the information, betrayal, mistrust, separation could result. When deciding whether to disclose personal information, communicators consider facts such as trust, loss of privacy, the longevity of the relationship, and previous reactions from former partners in similar instances. As long as the rewards outweigh the costs, information is shared. Throughout the movie there is a constant mention of how everything was so fast. The relationship happened so fast, the parents are meeting parents so fast, and everyone has to come to a decision all within a day because they are leaving after dinner. Joanna’s dad wants time to process, think, and gather all the fact possible before making a decision, but there just isn’t enough time. The normal way of going about serious things is to slow down and take your time, but in this instance we see how the dynamic changes when the norms are not followed.

Theory 2: Genderlect Theory

        Deborah Tannen uses the term “genderlect” to describe the way the conversation of men and women are not right and wrong, superior or inferior, they are just differe.t A useful way of viewing this that she uses is that they are as different cultures. Thus, men and women understand and take account of the very real differences of the other. So why do we communicate? The fundamental difference that drives much other behavior is that women have a deep drive to see connection, while men have a deep drive to seek status. In seeking status, men will avoid intangibles that may be challenged and prefer solid facts. Men will avoid emotion as they see it as weakness, unless they are using in a way that does not expose them to attack. Joanna was all about making a connection when explaining to her mother why she loved         Dr. Prentice. Women talk to create connection. Women will talk more about feelings, relationships, and people. They will include more emotional elements in their talk and will encourage others to do the same. For example, they will use emphasized intensifiers such as ‘so’ and ‘such’ I was so happy, he is such an idiot. How do we communicate differently? Women use rapport to talk. Men use report talk. Joanna’s mom understands why they are in their relationship because she talks to her daughter and can feel the passion in her tone and her story about how fast they fell in love and how real it is. Her father sees the simple facts that they are different age, background, and most importantly race, rather then the fact that their love can overcome their differences.  Women talk more in private conversations, using talk as a way of gaining rapport and connection. The two moms step outside to the terrace to really get a feel for where the other stands and be open about their feelings.  In public, there is less opportunity for creating individual relationships so they may talk less. Men talk more when in a public forum, where the audience has the power to recognize them and give them status they seek. The public stage brings out their competitive instinct and they will vie with other men to be top dog. When the men talk in the room they are loud and outspoken about their opinions. Joanna’s dad puts her mom down for being on her side because it involves feelings and she isn’t looking at the facts. Women will listen just to create empathy as well as to find hooks by which to connect better to another person. They will listen carefully and attentively for a long period without interrupting. Joanna’s mm listens intentively while hearing the story of how The Dr. and her daughter met and watches her pack while listening to her go on and on. When they do interrupt it is to show support or to ask questions to better understand the other person. Joanna’s mom only interrupts her dad on his rant when she lets her know that she will be on Joanna’s side should he go forward with his decision. Men, on the other hand use interruption as a power play by which they can grab attention and demonstrate status. In a male-dominate business meeting, when the boss interrupts, others will immediately allow this to happen. Men will avoid asking questions as this exposes their limitations and hand back control to the other person. Women speak a relational dialect. Men speak an instrumental dialect. The main goal of the theory is to adopt a mutual respect and understanding for the other culture (gender).