Advanced Biology

Josh Wienczkowski

EN 101 Saunier

November 21, 2005

Documentation, “Advanced Biology”

“There is no God! How do you explain the evolution of monkey to man?! With some story of Adam and Eve?! I bet there’s a virgin that gave birth to a mythical figure, am I right?” The view of an analytical atheist, only fourteen. That was me in an argument with my parents over grades that seemed to follow the annual trend of slipping. I was young, ignorant and confident of my superiority in intellectual dialogue. I also had the audacity to not only question a religion that had been in existence for over two thousand years, but to castigate my parental units for their faulty parenting on my behalf. “You never brought me to church, not once! So you’re trying to tell me that because of my lack of religiosity, I’m doing bad in school?! No, bad things happen to bad people because the world gets it’s own revenge in fate. So you have cancer, where’s your God now?” A feeling of “I won this round” through the silence and shock impressed on their faces was accomplished. Judith Ortiz Cofer, teacher of literature and writing at the University of Georgia in Athens writes a similar experience in “Advanced Biology” (Rites of Passage, Judie Rae and Catherine Fraga, eds. Singapore: Thomson and Heinle, 2002. 228-234) “…that was the harshest thing I could have said to anyone…my cheek was burning from the slap and I wanted to hurt her” (233).

I was in the excelled classes; the classes for the awkward teenagers to shine like their faces from a new biological phenomena, puberty. One class I grew immensely interested in was Advanced Biology and AP Human Anatomy. The topics we discussed were those unavailable to the basic biology student who, as in Cofer’s writing “…were looking at single-cell organisms under the microscope…a process as unexciting as watching a little kid blow bubbles” (230). The ideology of evolution and sexual reproduction wasn’t to be touched by the lowlier, unexcelled students but to be delved into by us fellow prodigies. As in “Advanced Biology” the strapping young lad who wooed Judith with his intellect (Ira) was much like myself in the topic of evolution. Judith tried to incorporate her religion into the tutor-tutored discussion of sexual reproduction, and Ira simply laughed. Ira boldly stated with confidence of his intelligence, “Judith, there are no exceptions in biology, only mutations, and adaptations through evolution” (231). I shared the same view, relying solely on science to prove the evolution of man and my agnostic views. Judith responded like my parents, ““The Virgin Mary had a baby without...” I [also my parents] couldn’t say having sex in the same breath as the name of the Mother of God” (231). Both Judith and my parents, timid and unsure of the response they were trying against Ira and my scientific superiority. What if God were to command this event, this earth shattering, seemingly impossible event (insert sarcasm here)?! Arguing feebly, Judith proposed, “Unless God will it” (231). As for Ira and myself, Cofer boldly stated it for us, “There is no God” (231). My parents just couldn’t see my side of the argument, nor could Judith reprimand Ira’s words, “...backed up by irrefutable scientific evidence” (231).

Now that Ira had done his job of winning Judith over, he made the move and kissed her. Only to be caught by Judith’s landlord who in turn called Ira’s mother, who then called Judith’s mother. This brought a disgrace to her family, “A dirty joke, a burden to her family...” (232). To no one’s astonishment, the father figure stepped in to give his monologue of heroic father proportions, “Please, please...We are a family, there is only us against the world. Please, please...” (232). If only real life situations were to occur like that; a dream of the Brady bunch and the Beavers comes to mind. Unlike Cofer’s situation, my parents failed to succumb to the oh so desired, white picket fence family. Instead, silence and a cold shoulder in response to my obvious cry for attention presented itself. There would be no disgrace on my family for being caught kissing a girl. I would be withdrawn from the circle that defined my family. Only I didn’t