Marriage? Think It Through!

Marriage

Com. 105

06/02/2006

Marriage? Think it Through!

“Love: a temporary insanity, curable by marriage.” (Bierce, 2006) The previous quote is what comes to this authors mind when I hear of couples discussing marriage. The common mistake that young couples make is that they do not stop to think about all the responsibilities that come with marriage or the ramifications if the marriage is unsuccessful. The intent of this essay is not to bash the wonderful idealism of marriage; but, rather to point out some the harsh realisms of marriage, such as divorce, children, and protect ting ones credit. Think of this essay as the calm voice of reasoning in ones love muddled head.

The odds of a marriage surviving are slim; according to a recent survey (2006), the divorce rate in America is at an alarming 50% and it does not seem to be getting better. In the same survey, they found that 37.5% of those who married between the ages of 20-24 were divorced. The divorce rate for people who first married between the ages of 35-39 was only 5.5%. That is a 32% margin difference, it is clear to see that the older you are before you choose to marry, the more likely your marriage will survive. The opinion of this author is that when couples marry young; men in particular, do not have a chance to live there dream. By marring young, the man does not have a chance to establish himself; his focus will be on his family, rather than on his education and career, which could provide for a better environment for his family. In addition, young people in general do not truly know what they want in life and they may choose a spouse who may not have the same dreams or agenda. How can a marriage survive, if both people in the marriage have two entirely different agendas? So before you tie the knot look over these statistics, ask yourself “What are my dreams and goals? What are my spouse’s dreams and goals?” and “Where do I fit into these statistics at?” Remember numbers never lie!

What about having children? When you are married undoubtedly, you and your spouse will have a discussion on whether or not to have children, if you have not done so before your marriage. (The author feels that you should definitely discuss the issue of children before the marriage.) According to the U.S. Bureau of Censes (2004), the average annual income for a married couple is 63,813 dollars. In an article on Moneycentral.com (MSN Money Staff, 2006) they estimated the cost of raising a child “until the age of 17 is 269,520 dollars”. That breaks down to 15,853 dollars per year or 7,926 dollars per spouse. The same article also pointed out that (MSN Money Staff, 2006) “this figure does not include the additional 20,000 to 150,000 dollars it will cost for a four-year education.”

Not only does a married couple have the financial burden of a child, they also have the responsibility of that child’s emotional well- being. If the couple decides to divorce, what happens to the child, if one parent neglects to take part in that child’s life?

There have been numerous reports and studies done (human illness, 2006) that show that children of divorced couples have more health problems, more likely to be sexually promiscuous, participate in antisocial behavior, and drop out of school than are children from two- parent non-divorced families. One should also note that children of divorced families are more likely to marry young and fall into the divorce trap as well. It is clear to see that children are truly blueprints of there parents or lack there of.

So what about your credit and assets that you worked so diligently on to obtain? This portion of the essay is written to inform men how they can protect there credit and assets in case of divorce. Doing this is only fair since most divorce courts will sympathize and favor on the side of the woman. The best advice to a man before he