Put It Down

put it down!

The most hotly contested battlefield in the gender wars may not necessarily be in the bedroom. It may be the bathroom. The seat-up vs. seat-down debate rages on and some interpret this as a sign of male insensitivity and overall cloddishness.

Although it doesn't rate up there with the unisex restroom in the Ally McBeal television show, the signage for the toilets at one Phoenix, Arizona advertising-public relations firm is an eye-catcher.

Instead of the plain old "Men" and "Women" on the politically correct male and female door signs, the restrooms entries at Cramer-Krasselt are adorned with tasteful, nearly look-alike 3-inch square photos of a toilet. There is one difference -- one has the seat up and the other has the seat down.

Is someone trying to tell us something?

Come on, guys! Maybe it's time to be a little more considerate. Like paying attention to the little things.

As a professional speaker, I lead seminars on personal relationships. In our discussions of "paying attention to the little things," taking the garbage out, leaving the toilet seat up and rolling the toilet paper the wrong way (among other things) seem to almost always creep into the conversation.

Although we may laugh at such trivial things, the truth is, it is important to our partners to do the little things consistently. It shows them we value and respect them.

Inventor, Tim Seniuk has the perfect solution to the "leaving the toilet seat up" problem. He has invented a toilet seat that goes down automatically after about two minutes. This $37 investment could save your marriage!

You will never again have to worry about experiencing the "porcelain splash" in the middle of the night! ;-)

Indifference is like water to a fire. The flame of love grows dim with indifference to your partner's needs. By far the most common and important way in which you can exercise your attention to your partner is by listening. Listening is an act of love.

Women can often tell a man's interest in them by the length of his attention span. It is one thing to pay attention and quite another to acknowledge her request and then remember to do it more than once without having to be reminded. She is not your mother.

It is unreasonable, and a breach of trust, to deny your lover's report of her feelings. When she expresses a need, it's your responsibility to do what you can to fulfil that need. Partners who love each other make this a priority.

Being attentive to your love partner's needs, regardless of what importance you may place on them, will support things going well in and out of the bedroom. Think about it.

Make a list of things you know that pleases your partner and remember do them consistently. Where is it written that a man should have only one job and a woman two? Housework is not just the woman's job!

If you feel that it is solely her responsibility to go about cleaning the house, paying the bills, taking care of the children, feeding the pets, emptying the trash, washing the clothes, vacuuming the carpet, getting the groceries, planning and cooking your dinner, all with great