Voluntary Childlessness

“There has been an unprecedented decline in childbearing in the Untied States over the last decade and a half. This change has been attributed to a number of factors, such as later marriage, fewer marriages, higher levels of female employment and education, and most remarkably, an apparent increase in voluntary childlessness” (Silka and Kiesler: 1). “The voluntary childless are those who do not have children, expect none, and have no known biological impediment to childbearing, or have been sterilized for contraceptive reasons” (Abma and Peterson 1995). These individuals have many personal, economic, and monetary reasons for a childless marriage and the majority of these women fit into one of four categories; practical, hedonists, idealistic, and emotional. Although, these couples vary in their reasons for not wanting children they have carefully examined the pros and cons of a childless family and made their choices accordingly.

Couples today are less sure about the rationale for having children. In former times (and in many non-western cultures today), children were seen as playing an important role in the continuance of family. Children may have been needed for kinship ties, to work on the family business, to look after parents in their old age, or to safeguard an inheritance. Presently, in Western society, the economy and the interests of industry have generally taken precedence over parenting and the interests of family (http:/wwwcfi.ie/feb2001/crisis.htm 3).

There are two categories of women who wish to remain childless, as identified by Baum, which fit into this particular scenario. The first group of women falls under the heading of “practical”. They have a practical reason for being childless, such as a desire to pursue their career without the interference of a family life, or the fear of passing on a genetic defect. The second group of women who share this viewpoint are “hedonists”. These women choose to remain childless through a desire to preserve their standard of living and who are unwilling to invest either time or money into raising children (Baum 1994).

Working parents with children are faced with limited daycare options, lack of quality time with their children, and less influence over their child’s developing values. These difficulties alone may be enough in order to discourage many couples from having children. Day care services today are extremely expensive and the majority of the services are only offered during normal working hours (8am-5pm), making it difficult for families that work second or third shift jobs to find quality care for their child. Similarly, extended families are smaller now and more scattered. This adds to the already narrow band of available caregivers for children, leaving the parents with few daycare options. With these constraints, parents may find it necessary to work rotating shifts, each spending part of day with the child while the other is at work. Many couples value their free time together and are not willing to stress their relationship in this way (Presser 1989).

Today, more parents are working and the school day is starting earlier and finishing later. It is believed that children get forty percent less of their parent’s time than they did a generation ago, which means that children are getting more and more values from their peer groups rather than their parents. This may make it impossible for parents to communicate their norms and values to their child. Working men and women do not have the same amount of quality time to spend with their children, as did their parents thirty years ago. Many who wish to remain childless know that they do not have time to create the type of relationship with a child that is necessary for the building of a parent-child bond or to bring the child up in the same manner in which they had been raised. They fear that building weak, mutually disrespectful relationship may turn their home life into a continuous struggle for power as the child grows (http:/wwwcfi

Accordingly, couples today see many pros associated with voluntary childlessness. Responsibilities of becoming a parent have grown tremendously. The mass media today is filled with horror stories about teens on drugs, day care abuse, kidnapping, and school shootings. Children are extremely expensive at many points during their life (birth, teen years, college years). We live in a time of increasing economic uncertainty, making it hard enough for individuals to provide for themselves without dependent children. Having children also increases active roles by parents, often spreading their resources too thin and placing too much stress on all relationships. For example, working mothers and fathers are expected to financially provide for their children, share quality time, divide household responsibilities (unfortunately many times this gets done according to gender), and continue