Silent Anguish

Silent Anguish

Imagine a young girl of twelve marrying a man of forty whom she has never seen before and being forced to produce children until her body is physically unable to perform a safe pregnancy. Imagine the girl being brainwashed and beaten for contradicting with a belief held by another man and forced to stay in her community for her entire life without knowing anything of the outside world. This scary world exists not just in imagination, but in the form of marriage known as polygamy. Found in almost every country, including the United States, the practice is considered a right to a select few and a bane to the majority of others. Polygamy is a way of life that should not be allowed in society due to the fact that it creates male-dominated marriages, forces women into subordinate roles, and produces unworkable families full of strife, abuse and incest.

Polygamy is a form of marriage in which a person has more than one spouse at a time; it most often occurs in the form of polygyny, when a man has multiple wives. Although the practice has been illegal in the United States for over one hundred years, it is estimated that over 30,000 citizens are involved in plural marriages (Eagle). Polygamy is mainly practiced by Mormon fundamentalists living in Utah and Arizona, but there are smaller pockets elsewhere in the country. Polygamous families usually live in isolated communities that are completely unaffected by the outside world. The seclusion of these towns raises concerns for the relative safety and health of the town’s residents as well as the enforcement of state and federal laws followed by the rest of the country.

Although marriage is considered to be the mutual forming of a bond between a couple, in many polygamous marriages women are forced into the role of wife. They have no choice but to become subservient to their husband. From an early age they are taught of male dominance and are brainwashed by their culture and religion to refuse to fight back (Eagle). Any women who do have thoughts of their own and try to resist are put in their place by fear. Wives are scared of husbands, whom they are supposed to love. According to Rowenna Erickson, who was born in a polygamist sect in Utah, “[t]here is lots of fear, all the time…fear of not being good enough” (Mann). Women who inadequately perform their role as wife and mother are abused, often in the form of physical beatings. Women who refuse to comply with the set standards of the household may also be placed in “reeducation camps” where they are coerced by physical and emotional pain to conform to the general will of community (Mann). It is in this way they are kept in line. An even scarier fact is that many women do not even know that another way of life even exists. If they leave the secluded town in which they live without their husband’s consent, they risk the chance of being caught by other members of the community and severely punished. The women that do escape do not know where to turn for help and are often compelled to return to their abusive husbands and the only life that they have ever been a part. Women in polygamous societies are unaware of the freedom and equality possessed by other women because the ideas are absent from their lives.

As can be seen, husbands in polygamous marriages (also known as patriarchs) are not affectionate individuals. Some men marry purely to satisfy sexual urges and do not care about their wives and children. In the past, polygamy had a practical purpose in the lives of the Mormons; the shortage of men in the American West prompted some to engage in plural marriages to prevent a decrease in the group’s population. But now most men perform the practice solely with religious and criminal intentions in mind. Also, men gain large amounts of financial control over their family and may do as they please without anyone’s approval or disapproval. Rowenna Erickson states that patriarchs “refuse to take responsibility for the support and care of their children,” often leaving their wives as the sole parent for the children (Mann). The men continually move to and from each of their wives’ houses and may not see some of their families for over a week, even though they all live in a single town. Males in polygamous societies view their wives and children as objects, and treat them accordingly.

There are hundreds of reported cases of abuse within polygamous households. In one case in Utah in 1998 John Daniel Kingston beat his daughter repeatedly with a leather belt on at least twenty-eight different occasions before being caught by the police (Eagle). This type of behavior is common in families dominated by an aggressive father and husband, but the abuse is much worse than just physical pain. David Kingston, John Daniel Kingston’s brother, was sentenced to ten years in prison for incest and unlawful