Thanatopsis

Thanatopsis

Death is inevitable. Every creature and living organism on this Earth possesses mortality and will die at some point. However, even though we know we will die, humans seem to dread death and are emotionally struck by it when it happens to someone they know. This is human nature and it is necessary to our souls. When someone dies and no one is there that has known that person to grieve and remember him, it is truly tragic. That person’s legacy has faded and their time on this Earth, however technically meaningful and purposeful, seems pointless if it is not remembered or appreciated by anyone who would care enough to grieve. When a senior citizen of 70, 80, 90, or 100 years passes away and has children and close friends there to mourn them, that death is not tragic, but almost uplifting. There is significant value, and much joy since that elderly person’s life was celebrated and remembered by their loved ones. The most unfortunate circumstance of death is when an individual dies before they are able to completely live and to experience fulfillment of all opportunities. Specifically, I have had two experiences with death in my life that have affected me significantly.

Four years ago, my father was diagnosed with acute leukemia. The next two years he battled with all of his will this aggressive beast until he finally could hold on no longer, relapsed one last time, and passed away. The majority of his last two years was experienced in a hospital or confined to our house. Before my dad was diagnosed with cancer, he worked in New York City on Wall Street and wore himself down commuting every day from Ridgefield and trying to support his family. He dreaded death because he had not done many things that he wanted to pursue in life. He wanted to see me graduate high school because he had worked hard to place his son in a great school district and he wanted to live to see his son succeed. Superficially, he also wanted to drive a convertible. He had always dreamed of purchasing a luxury car that would have been so enjoyable to drive. Because he wanted to live so earnestly, he even decided to have a bone marrow transplant that was one of his only chances to live, even though it was extremely painful, hard to endure, and still left about an 80% chance of death. His urge to survive, the fact that he had not lived out his life, and that he had not been able to completely raise his son, was why his death was so tragic, especially to his family, but also to friends of various levels of intimacy.

Six years ago, my Grandma passed away. She had a vibrant personality and was a memorable person. I still remember spending time with her during summer visits