Adultery
By: Dina • Research Paper • 2,093 Words • July 28, 2010 • 2,648 Views
Adultery
Adultery
"Why did it happen?" "How long has this been going on?" "Does this mean my relationship is over?" Many people asked themselves these questions and similar after an unfaithful partner has been discovered. There are many answers to those questions, but never a simple one. Some people are unfaithful for reasons that lie in their past, for example a history of adultery between their parents in their marriage. Others are unfaithful because of how they view the purpose of the opposite gender. You have men who believe that women are prey and should be caught and then women who believe that they cant survive without a man. These people are caught in a way of thinking about the other gender, which causes their behavior to lead to unfaithfulness. After realizing the many reasons why it could happen. It always important for the person to try to understand why it has occurred, the reason may lie within the relationship itself. Once you understand or have some sense into why it happened, you can work on ways to approach the situation. This is as important for the person being unfaithful, the partner, and the third willing participant.
After grasping a sense at what of what is going on, most psychologists suggest you try to understand the various ways a partner can be in an extramarital affair. Affairs are defined in many ways. First an affair always takes place over a period of time, it may be very emotionally charged and it may or may not involve sexual intercourse. Also, an affair can have a sexual involvement and not be part of an emotional attachment, but it may also include it. Once a committed relationship is established, if there is a secret sexual and romantic involvement outside of the relationship, it is experienced as an infidelity.
We can best understand any act by openly considering many factors that are involved. It may also help to know whether there was a strong emotional bond between your mate and the other person. Some find it very important to themselves to find out if their partner has been sexually involved with that third party, while others are so distraught over the fact that their partner has chosen to be emotionally involved with someone other then themselves.
The secrecy involved with having an affair is hurtful; the discovery that one is secretly involved in a gay or lesbian relationship is confusing and painful to many people. Again, understanding the nitty-gritty of any act of adultery can shed light on why it happened. The more emotional we feel about something, the less clearly we can think about it. Standing back, clearly looking at what has happened, and communicating about the incident can always be helpful to a couple or the individual to get over the initial shock of discovering that their partner has been unfaithful.
Men and women often seek different things when they become involved in extramarital activity. Research shows that there are important differences that determine why men and women become involved extramaritally. Psychologists Glass and Wright found that women are more likely to link sex with love, while men's involvements are more often primarily sexual. This is not true of all men and women. Some men view and affair as a return to romance and excitement and an escape from day to day responsibilities; Some women feel that extramarital sex, wit no emotional attachment, adds spice to their lives. In many instances, the beliefs that people hold about why people stray make it difficult for a couple to communicate when an unfaithful act has been discovered. Many women don't believe their husband or partner when they do try to explain that his involvement with the other woman had nothing do with love, and had no intentions of hurting her. As for some men would accuse their wife or partner of lying when she says that there was no intercourse but the affair was only to fill an emotional crave for attention. Men believe that if a man is ever close to a woman, his only sole goal is to have sex with her. The beliefs that men and women hold about each other's activities can clearly cloud thoughts and make it difficult to communicate honestly. Because of this, it is not uncommon to hear that a man has strayed away claim that his marriage is good and mean it. A man in this standing believes that it is his male privilege and that it has nothing to do with his feelings about his relationship. On the other hand, women who stray are feeling emotionally disappointed in their marriage or relationship and reach a point were they look beyond their partner for emotional comfort.
There are many reasons why extramarital behaviors occur, the most frequent ones are, not understanding what relational love is, the inability to communicate feelings or needs, not having the verbal