Alternatives to Self Injury

So what do I do instead?

Many people try substitute activities as described above and report that sometimes they work, sometimes not. One way to increase the chances of a distraction/substitution helping calm the urge to harm is to match what you do to how you are feeling at the moment.

First, take a few moments and look behind the urge. What are you feeling? Are you angry? Frustrated? Restless? Sad? Craving the feeling of SI? Depersonalized and unreal or numb? Unfocused?

Next, match the activity to the feeling. A few examples:

angry, frustrated, restless

Try something physical and violent, something not directed at a living thing:

Slash an empty plastic soda bottle or a piece of heavy cardboard or an old shirt or sock.

Make a soft cloth doll to represent the things you are angry at. Cut and tear it instead of yourself.

Flatten aluminum cans for recycling, seeing how fast you can go.

Hit a punching bag.

Use a pillow to hit a wall, pillow-fight style.

Rip up an old newspaper or phone book.

On a sketch or photo of yourself, mark in red ink what you want to do. Cut and tear the picture.

Make Play-Doh or Sculpey or other clay models and cut or smash them.

Throw ice into the bathtub or against a brick wall hard enough to shatter it.

Break sticks.

I've found that these things work even better if I rant at the thing I am cutting/tearing/hitting. I start out slowly, explaining why I am hurt and angry, but sometimes end up swearing and crying and yelling. It helps a lot to vent like that.

Crank up the music and dance.

Clean your room (or your whole house).

Go for a walk/jog/run.

Stomp around in heavy shoes.

Play handball or tennis.

sad, soft, melancholy, depressed, unhappy

Do something slow and soothing, like taking a hot bath with bath oil or bubbles, curling up under a comforter with hot cocoa and a good book, babying yourself somehow. Do whatever makes you feel taken care of and comforted. Light sweet-smelling incense. Listen to soothing music. Smooth nice body lotion into the parts or yourself you want to hurt. Call a friend and just talk about things that you like. Make a tray of special treats and tuck yourself into bed with it and watch TV or read. Visit a friend.

craving sensation, feeling depersonalized, dissociating, feeling unreal

Do something that creates a sharp physical sensation:

Squeeze ice hard (this really hurts). (Note: putting ice on a spot you want to burn gives you a strong painful sensation and leaves a red mark afterward, kind of like burning would.)

Put a finger into a frozen food (like ice cream) for a minute.

Bite into a hot pepper or chew a piece of ginger root.

Rub liniment under your nose.

Slap a tabletop hard.

Snap your wrist with a rubber band.

Take a cold bath.

Stomp your feet on the ground.

Focus on how it feels to breathe. Notice the way your chest and stomach move with each breath.

[NOTE: Some people report that being online while dissociating increases their sense of unreality; be cautious about logging on