Ethics and Morals in Marriage

“Can I spend the night with you tonight” the young boy asks the other boy? The response, “No, my dad has me this weekend, maybe next week.” We live in a world where over half of the marriages end in divorce. This is truly a confounding issue that faces us today. The moral and ethical ramifications brought about by such a change in family organization will only begin to show in the years to come. Some of these issues are addressed in both Laurie Abraham’s “Divorced Father,” and Barbara Whitehead’s “Women and the Future of Fatherhood.”

Where did this all begin? Well, of course all the demoralizing things that can be seen on television have not helped to build strong values in our society. We can no longer expect to watch a game of football without seeing a woman’s breast. Our society is truly crumbling before our eyes. The younger generations now view sex in a more liberal way than ever before. They feel that they can have sex and not face the consequences later. These teens then face a harsh reality of having to raise a child having no experience doing so. The teen parent cannot rely on his or her partner because he or she does not know anything as well, and the partner feels trapped in a marriage they did not want, but cannot leave. The couple in-turn turns to their parents for guidance. Having a child is hard enough when it is brought in loving family who is prepared for him or her, but when it is burden for the mother and father, then problems are sure to arise. The young couple has a possibility of surviving these hard times, but the reality is that they will most likely not be able to deal with it. They will either tear away at each other, or grow bored with the lust that has faded with time. Divorce is band-aid society has for them, a solution that leaves the children with a missing link.

The product of this marriage is a child raised by parents who knew nothing about rearing a child, and who now knows nothing about a proper and loving family because he or she did not grow up in one. One can just imagine this situation occurring. There are countless children raised by their grandparents or adopted families who wonder everyday why their mommy and daddy did not love them enough to keep them. These same children soon realize that they were mistakes. This is a sad reality, and as more and more generations grow up like this they will begin to see it as the norm.

What we as a society need to do is go back to when children had a loving mother and father; children were born after marriage, and raised in a happy and loving family. The dynamics of marriage have changed though; the definition of what marriage is coming into question. Is marriage only between a man and a woman? My personal opinion is that anyone should be able to marry, but the best design for a family is one of a man and woman. Many would object to this strict definition, but the impact of a child raised by a gay or lesbian couple must be taken into account. Bulling is a reality and children with different situations at home are easier to fall prey to it. Some might also have an issue with a gay or lesbian raising a child of the same sex. These same people would argue they would offer a very unorthodox home that condones same sex relationships. Another issue that has faced families in the last few decades is that of income. Women in our society have more freedom than ever before. Women now more often than not account for an equal share of the household income, making raising a family more difficult. In the past women were only expected to raise the children, but now bringing home an income is also necessary. The ways we view and have changed marriage today will forever shape our society for generations to come.

The structure of marriage has undergone some remodeling, as a child some of my friend’s parents were divorced. My best friend Adam, whom I knew since fifth grade, parents divorced when he was eleven. I did not notice many differences when it happened, I did sense that he was more withdrawn and quiet than he was before. When I did talk to him about it years later, he told me they were tough times; his parents had fought a lot with each other, but now were somewhat more amicable. I try to wonder what my life would have been like if my parents had divorced, his parents divorced because they fought, my parents often argued nonstop, what was to prevent them from divorcing? I think what differentiates my parents from his were the values my parents have. They grew up in Mexico and were raised Catholic. This impacted their view’s on divorce. However, if my parents would have divorced, I would have lived with my mother. First of all, she knows how to raise and