The Effect of Being an only Child on the Child

Thesis:

The Effect on being an only child on the child’s personality

Literature Review:

Before a child has friends they have their family. Everything that they know and love about the world mostly comes from what they see around in their house. Children usually find role models in their family most of the time it is the child’s sibling. Yet only children don’t have that experience of living with another child and begin to develop their personality and traits from what they see in their parents. An only child’s role model is usually their mom or dad. Most of their time is anyway spent with them. Looking up to an adult rather than a younger being can really change a lot about the child’s personality. Only child are mostly known to be responsible and develop good language skills because they are around their parents so much. They may see the responsibility that the parent has and learn how to be responsible from that. They don’t have any influences of seeing a child being lazy and not listening to their parent they just see the work of the parent. Also because an only child’s main person to speak to is an adult they learn how to speak more properly and are able to talk better because they are learning from an expert of speaking that will not make mistakes at saying common words. This is a great advantage later in life for these only children. (Brophy, 1989)

Only children are also commonly known to become more mature faster then other children who grow up with siblings. Their maturity grows faster because again adults surround them most of the time. They copy what they see their parents do and they try to fit in and be like the parents. As other kids with siblings they would try to fit in with their siblings but only children have their parents to fit in with. (Koontz, 1989)

As these only children try to fit in with their parents they also try hard to fill up the expectations of their parents. Most parents put very high expectations on their only child since this is their only child and all their energy and attention is on them. They have high expectations because this is the only child that can make them proud. Knowing this, only children have a hard time trying to be the best. Only children have this pressure of being perfect for their parents because if they make a mistake they can’t say well at least I’m doing better than my brother or sister. They have no one to compare to. Everything they do will be watched carefully and never taken lightly. Being in this atmosphere though brings only children to be very motivated workers and perfectionists. This is another get benefit in life for only children. (Sulloway, 1997)

Being an only child though is not filled with simply a positive side. It can also be a bad effect on the child’s personality. The child being the center of attention all the time to the parents makes them feel very special and important. They soon begin to believe that they may be the center of the world since everything in their household is revolved another them. They never have to face the problem of sibling rivalry so no one ever becomes more significant then them. Having all this praise and interest about these only children all the time will make them to be self-centered at times. Being self-centered is not a good trait to have because they have to be aware that there are other people in the world. The only children must consider how to care about other people and their feelings. Living as an only child it is hard to learn these lessons because they have no friends from the start like a brother or sister to teach them how to interact with their peers. Nonetheless only children are not hopeless and once they head into school they learn their lessons of socializing with others. (Sulloway, 1997)

I found great interest in this topic because I myself am an only child. From this research and project I learned many things about myself that I never realized. It was very exciting to understand why I am, how I am. I would have never have thought that being an only child without siblings really affects my personality. I began to understand that it does in both good and bad ways. I also was able to relate to some of the journals I read about only children. This project was a real learning experience for me.

Hypotheses:

1. Only children are hard working and good students

2. Only children are self-absorbed

Appendix:

1. I am an only child