Active Listening; Effective Listening Skills

Active Listening; Effective Listening Skills

Growing up our parents always taught us, treat the way you would like to be treated. Well, the same goes for listening; we should listen to others the way we would want to be listened to. Proper listening skills are a very valuable asset to have. People who work in an organization tend to spend most of their time in some form of the communication process. Effective communication is an essential component of organizational success whether it is at the interpersonal, intergroup, intragroup, organizational, or external levels.

Even though we have been communicating throughout our entire lives, the process of transmitting information from an individual (or group) to another is a very complex process with many sources of potential error. With all communication, some of the meaning behind the message is lost in the process. This tends to happen the most in cross cultural situations where language barriers come into play. In the communication process it is crucial to be aware of potential errors. It is also very important to understand that a lot of communication is non-verbal. The non-verbal part includes such things as body language and tone. (Fenson, 2007)

There are a wide number of sources of noise or interference that can enter into the communication process. This can occur when people know each other very well and should understand the sources of error. In a work setting, it is even more common since interactions involve people who not only don't have years of experience with each other, but communication is complicated by the complex and sometimes confrontational relationships that exist at work. (Fenson, 2007)

We derive a lot from the non-verbal cues that the other person we are communicating with gives off. Often a person says one thing but communicates something totally different through vocal intonation and body language. These mixed signals force the receiver to choose between the verbal and nonverbal parts of the message. Most often, the receiver chooses the nonverbal aspects. Mixed messages create tension and distrust because the receiver senses that the communicator is hiding something or is being less than candid. That is why effective listening is so important. (Fenson, 2007)

According to Dr. Lyman K. Stail, a known specialist in listening, listening is comprised of four stages. These are; hear the message, interrupt, evaluate, and then respond to it. His studies show that we understand, evaluate, and retain about 50 percent of what is said to us. In the workplace this can cause serious problems. The time spent having to repeat and redo assignments and instruction can be better used and more valuable. Our personal lives can also suffer from lack of listening. The need to have those who truly listen to us is a common human desire. Those people are the ones who keep us calm and support us. (Shepell, 2007)

If our listening capacity allows us to take in between 400 to 600 words a minute and the average speaking rate is 125 words per minute, why do we still have problems listening? One main reason for that is a lack of listening training. Even thought we are taught to listen from day one of our lives, we are often not taught how to truly listen. The skill of communication is often taken for granted. We also often are too busy to realize when we need to focus. In order to become a good listener we need to learn to be flexible with our time. We need to learn when to lend an ear to someone who needs to be listened to. Learning to choose the right listening style for each situation and person is how we can become flexible listeners. To choose the right listening style one might consider their reason for their listening. (Shepell, 2007)

To become a better listener you must see what kind of listener you are. There are four types of listeners. The biased listener does not really listen. He tunes out in order to plan his next line which is based on some preconceived notion. The distracted listener does not usually realize the importance of what is being said to him. They allow both the physical and internal distractions to get the better of them. The impatient listener tends to interrupt and rarely let’s people finish what they have to say. Lastly is the passive listener. A passive listener does not realize when to be active. In a phone conversation setting, often the person talking will ask “are